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Name: Ria
B-day: September 5, 1988
Location: QC, Philippines
DevArt: nayomi-chan
Multiply: spacepiratesolstice

A Glance



- find out what I want in life
- this moment to happen
- be a Dean's List-er
- learn how to ride a motorcycle
- go skydiving
- go scuba diving
- make my own blog layout
- learn how to use Flash
- travel more
- improve my drawing skills
- go to a Flea market
- a Tarot Card Deck
- fashion sense
- femme outfits
- witty t-shirts
- vintage clothes and accessories
- make my own clothes!
- go on a shopping spree
- contribute to WWF
- a DSLR
- bake something
- an underwater camera
- cosplay again
- visit my online friends
- stop being a safeist
- happiness

lead you elsewhere

+devArt : nayomi-chan+
+Multiply: spacepiratesolstice+
+Multiply: Banana Colada+
+Holy Order: Forums+
+Rising Force: Forums+
+Deviant Art+

take my hand

Cai + Gela + Racine + Kari + Gretchen + Miranda + Berbi + Gab + Convi + Maku + Lei + Yeli + Carmi + Guia + Ginell + Jab + Amary + Zychez + John + Justin + RayRay + Rei + Mitch + Vox + Toni + Maru + Coco + Joseph + Clement + Rob + Mai

Look Back

+ March 2003 + + April 2003 + + May 2003 + + June 2003 + + July 2003 + + August 2003 + + September 2003 + + October 2003 + + November 2003 + + December 2003 + + January 2004 + + February 2004 + + March 2004 + + April 2004 + + May 2004 + + June 2004 + + July 2004 + + August 2004 + + September 2004 + + October 2004 + + November 2004 + + December 2004 + + January 2005 + + February 2005 + + March 2005 + + April 2005 + + May 2005 + + June 2005 + + July 2005 + + August 2005 + + September 2005 + + October 2005 + + November 2005 + + December 2005 + + January 2006 + + February 2006 + + March 2006 + + April 2006 + + May 2006 + + June 2006 + + July 2006 + + August 2006 + + September 2006 + + October 2006 + + November 2006 + + December 2006 + + January 2007 + + February 2007 + + March 2007 + + April 2007 + + May 2007 +


Creative Commons License

Content belongs to me.

Designed by: {/lisee:D
x x

Thursday, March 31, 2005
Happy Wedding Anniversary!
Listening to: AC

It's at times like these that I wish I knew I would see either Yeli or Ja the next day. ._.

Today was my parent's 21st wedding anniversary. I went to school to pick up my card. Not bad, but still icky. Picked up my grad pics as well, and got my souvenir from the ball as well. I like the box. Another to add to my collection? Lol. Anyway, I got to see some of my classmates and batchmates. I saw Mai, and she had her own kwento to tell me about the Grad Ball. XD BTW, I know his name now, but I have no idea how it's spelled. XD Mai, that was just... freaky. @_@ Hahaha! Eeeek! As we say, 'RAGING HORMONES!' Still, I can't believe you thought of me then. ;;)

Then we went home.. used the PC, changed my lay. <3 Then we went out to Shangri-la to celebrate my parents' wedding anniversary. We split up and decided to meet up again later to decide where to eat. So I was left walking around Shang by myself. ._. Twas boring and tiring. Plus it gave me too much idle time where I thought too much and ended up depressing myself. n_n; Luckily I was texting Berbi and that lightened my mood. We talked about what we would do in situations concerning sex and sudden sex changes. XD Ate dinner with my family, though I couldn't bring myself to eat much. =/ That's been bothering me lately. I end up getting really hungry, but I can't bring myself to eat. @_@ Anyway, we talked about things we remembered of the places we've lived. We talked about San Diego (well, they talked about San Diego. I wasn't born yet then. XD), Okinawa, Subic, and Yokosuka. The things we remembered are pretty freaky. I remembered our pet jellyfish we had in Okinawa. Wolfenstein my mom played on our uber old PC. The hole in front of our house in Subic. (Our house is still there. I visited it a few years ago.) The demented snowman we made with our neighbors. Our neighbor who stole my Pokemon cards! :O Hahahaha. Yeah. There's a lot more, but let's leave it at that. After eating, we walked around again. There was a fashion show going on, so I got to watch it. The designer was Ivana Helsinki. I think. Was pretty cool to watch it. :D

The drive home.. was depressing. Usually when I don't feel 'ok' I keep myself busy. You know, to keep my mind off of it. But how the heck do you keep yourself busy in a car? O_o I blasted my MP3 Player, and only then did I realize how loud I listen to my music. n_n; We stopped at Easy Street, a bar at Royal Place, which is right in front of Ever Commonwealth. Drank a Shirley Temple. :P But I had another allergy breakout, and I couldn't keep still. >_< I was restless and uncomfortable, so I decided to walk around. Turns out there's a new Internet Cafe on the top floor there. Opens next tuesday, if I heard the girl right. I'll see if the place is reliable when it opens.

Went home. Yeah. Felt horrible. But there's nothing a smile can't hide. :D

{/11:59 AM} - { 0 }
I'm almost somewhere.

Monday, March 28, 2005
Grad Ball Madness
Listening to: AC

Grad Ball~!

Just so you know, I have roughly 61 grad ball pics, and I have no intention of posting them all here. XD

After getting fixed up, Dad and I left for Edsa Shang. I met up with Gela in 1013 (our room <3) and gifted her with a can of hairspray. :P Soon Cai arrived, and then Gretchen followed. Racine was late. XD We went down to the ball room, registered, and got our pics with the freaky Skin White poster. :O Then we had our Ball Pics taken. The photographer made me do a vixen pose. O_o Don't ask. XD

Before dinner Miggy showed up and gave me flowers. He also gave me something other than that but that's for me to know. *points at her conspirators* You conspire against me! XD Hahaha. :P Then dinner. During that time they showed a compiled video that they had taken of us during the Skin White talk. After that they showed the Powerpoint presentations of each class, but the computer was screwed up and so it was cut short.

Batch bands played, and there were awards. After that was DANCING! T'was fun. XD We messed around with the balloons. I danced with one of the balloon towers, had a balloon fight with Cai, found the demented water balloons XD, stole balloons, and popped balloons with Mai and her date. I felt bad because I almost stole her from her date... again. ;;) I saw Ja (meh lover) and danced a bit with her. Finally we decided to go up. We messed around on the escalator and took pics while going up and down. Then we went to our room, 1013. <3

After the Grad Ball was even more fun.

We went up and watched TV while each of us took our turns taking a shower. Took even more vanity pics. I am officially vain, and am also a camera whore. Lol. Now I have more controversial pics of me floating around. XD Cai soon fell asleep. My feet were literally killing me, so Gretchen put some hot water into the tub and she and I dipped our feet there. We even put bath gel to make it bubbly! Racine joined, then Gela, and we talked about a loooot of stuff. Before we knew it, it was 2am. XD Then Cai suddenly appeared in the doorway with her hair down and made us jump! I was so surprised I didn't say anything. Gela screamed. XDDD We talked a bit more, then finally went to bed. But we watched TV for a while first. We saw the news about the earthquake in Indonesia, and it freaked us out. At around 4am, there was a knock at the door. Omg, it was Ja and Orange! Haha. They stayed awhile, and even slept with us. Ja slept next to me. XD HAHAHAHA. Then they left and we got some shut eye.

I woke up at around 8:30. Gela, Gretchen and Cai had changed, and Racine was still in bed with me. Then I noticed there were rose petals on the bed. XD Hahaha, ano ba yan. XD Changed, and went down to eat breakfast. Saw Ja, Patty and DJ there. Went up, and watched part of A Tale of Two Sisters. Imagine our surprise when we noticed it was dubbed in Filipino. :P It barely made any sense. But oh well.

We went to Galle, first stop was Mercury Drug. I had to get medications for my allergies, and Racine had to get something for her tummy. Went to Starbucks, then to Ice Monster. Gela and I got KFC. :P We decided to walk around afterwards. Gela accidentally got her Strepsils thrown away. n_n;; I was able to get a jacket like shirt. Grey. :D Shopping rocks.

Eventually we went to Cheesecake, etc. We bummed around there while Racine looked for a phone to call her mom with. Gretchie fell asleep. :P After that we were all dead tired. When I got home, I went straight to bed, even tho it was still the afternoon.

Grad Ball was great. <3

{/11:59 AM} - { 0 }
I'm almost somewhere.

Sunday, March 27, 2005
I'm Back
Listening to: Yellowcard ~ Only One

Dang, it's been forever since I last blogged.

Well, I'm officially a HS Grad. W00t. n_n;

Arrrrrrrrgh. The search for a new layout that suits my fancy annoys me. D: Because I can't find one that I like, and I end up wanting to make my own when I know I don't know how. And then I find a layout that I like, but I don't want to have to insert the blogger tags manually, blah blah blah. *continues to yell at herself mentally for another 5 minutes* Ah screw it. I'll find one sooner or later. Or make one that's horrible but makes me happy.

I want to scream! Pull out a gun and bring it point blank against someone's head and look at them with a look that doesn't show if your're going to pull the trigger in spite or pull back laughing your head off. @_@ Which... I did already.

I spent the Holy Week in the province. It. Was. Boring. Mainly because I was sick. I mean, all I did was sleep and eat. O_o There were times when all I would do was lie down because my head hurt so much. ._. Then Tristan and Jeth had to be idiots and stepped on my back. T_T Then I couldn't even lie down in peace. We watched movies to pass the time. White Noise, Finding Nemo, Ice Age... We started Cabin Fever, but it started to get disgusting so we didn't finish it. I wanted to watch Saw. XD But everyone else didn't want to watch with me. :( I got to ride a bike again, after so long. I messed around with Tristan's bike around the garage, then I started biking outside. It was there that I found to my horror that Tristan's bike doesn't have brakes. XD Good thing I was wearing my sandals then. It was with Christine's bike tho that I got hurt. Hers still has training wheels on it, and as I was biking up the path, one of the training wheels got caught on a curb and I almost went flying. Imagine that, a flying Ria. n_n; Luckily I didn't go flying, instead I scraped my knee on the right pedal. >_> But oh well. That's the kind of kid I am. Always getting scraps and scratches and such. And burns. *looks at the burn on her arm* n_n; Burns are nasty tho. Yech. Peeling off your own skin isn't exactly... comforting to look at.

Anyway. Ball is tomorrow. I can't honestly say that I'm ready. n_n; I don't even have any accessories. But what the hell. I'm probably going to look for something at Ever tomorrow. XD Yes, go crammers. I hope the Ball will be fun. Last night to hang out with the gals in formal wear. ;;) Edsa Shang~ Euphoria! I don't know if Miggy is still going. O_o He told me that he might go as part of the crew for a band that would perform, but I don't know if that's going to push thru. As for me, I'm going stag, as always. Stag is different for the opposite sexes. O_o But I'm not going to get into that again. The girls and I will be staying the night at Shangri-la tomorrow night! I'm excited. <3 Haha, I want to parade around Eastwood or some coffeeshop in my gown, like Gela suggested. And act like everything is perfectly normal when it isn't, because life isn't normal and I'm damn happy that mine is norwhere near normal.

Did you know that MERV HQ still lives?!?! O_o Yeah. It does. LMAO. But it's covered in ads now. The last guestbook sign was January 1 of last year tho. XD It's even got Gretchen's uber long intro to the ROW. XD

Once while we were in the car, my dad said that there are only two types of wars; Religious and Political. So my brother wondered out loud what it would be like if the whole world was Christian. O_o A lot of stuff would be gone, that's for sure. Or what if the whole world was Communist. XD Nice. How... fun. [Yech XD] The world would be crappy if everything was the same. Thus, Diversity! :D

I'm rambling now. At least, in my mind I am. =_=

I feel... awkward. @_@

{/9:52 PM} - { 0 }
I'm almost somewhere.

Sunday, March 20, 2005

Listening to:

I have so much to say.

But I'm not allowed to blog right now.

{/10:18 PM} - { 1 }
I'm almost somewhere.

Wednesday, March 16, 2005
Listening to: -

I don't have any energy to rant today. Which is ok; I don't really have anything to rant about.

I took Claritin this morning, and it worked for a while. But as the day progressed I started getting allergic reactions on my skin. So I took Hydroxizine(sp?) about 15 minutes ago and I'm already feeling sleepy.

Sop 1 people are hyper people. =P

Uncle Harry and Auntie Baby are here from Canada. The last time they were here was in 2001 I think. But they didn't bring Nina, Judy Anne and JR. =/

Got my hair trimmed today.

Still looking for a layout.

Bleh, I'm going to bed. >_<

{/10:39 PM} - { 4 }
I'm almost somewhere.

Tuesday, March 15, 2005
Body Failure
Listening to: Lost Prophets ~ Last Train Home

My body is suddenly failing me. Headaches. Stuffy nose. HIVES. I've got HIVES all over my back and I have no idea why! It's like someone whipped me on my back over and over again. [Welts. EW.] Frick... This is exactly what my brother has. >_< But HIVES are caused by allergies. The only thing I'm allergic to is Amoxicillin [an antibiotic] and Nickel. I wore earrings to school today.. and my ears did get irritated.. But the last time I had an allergic reaction was nearly 8 years ago. And it wasn't this bad. >_< Ack. I need someone to hold me down. Tie my hands. Contain me. This is so uncomfortable. I am screaming silently in frustration.

Had a talk today about Gang Rape and other crimes against chastity and such. Bleh. My headaches started then so I didn't really listen much. Gender bias sucks. Ironically, gender bias is shown in some of our laws. And Racine is right in saying that rape is just icky. *shudder* Even more so gang rape. But here's something to think about. Contrary to popular belief, rape is usually committed by someone the victim knew. I'm not pointing fingers or anything. I have a lot of guy friends and I trust them, but like our speaker said, you just have to be careful. And don't do anything that might lead to getting raped, like getting drunk or taking drugs. >_>

After recess, had a talk about the Grad Ball with our sponsor, SkinWhite. Not much, we heard the exact same stuff last year when we were prepping for the prom. Some extra things tho. Anyway, Yeli won the grand prize thingie. You now have a Chauffer on the Grad Ball. XD

Then.. Practice. Tiring. Made my headache worse. n_n;; Got kicked out of the Gym by the grade 6 girls. Don't complain.

I'm going to change this layout. It doesn't work on Opera and Firefox.

Seven Deadliest Sins

1. Who did you last get angry with?
Most likely my mom.

2. What is your weapon of choice?
Words. Or lack of them. *dagger eyes* :P

3. Would you hit a member of the opposite sex?
If I found him worthy of physical assault, yeah. XD

4. How about of the same sex?
Same. Except I'd probably slap instead of punch.

5. Who was the last person who got really angry at you?
Me mum. I anger her easily.

6. What is your pet peeve?
People who try to make their lives a tragedy.

7. Do you keep grudges, or can you let things go?
I let things go all the time.

1. What is one thing you're supposed to do daily that you have not done in a long time?
Fix my bed. Yeah. I don't remember the last time I really fixed my bed.

2. What is the latest you've ever woken up?
12 or so. *thinks* I dont' think I've ever gone past that.

3. Name a person you've been meaning to contact, but haven't:
Miranda, Dustin

4. What is the last lame excuse you made?
I suck.

5. Have you ever watched an infomercial all the way through?
Yeah. They're amusingly ridiculous. :P

6. When was the last time you got a good workout in?
PROSEC Fieldtrip. XD January.

7. How many times did you hit the snooze button on your alarm clock today?
My clock doesn't have a snooze button. D:

1. What is your overpriced yuppie beverage of choice?
Coke? Is that an overpriced yuppie beverage?

2. Do you eat the skin of off chicken?
Yes. n_n;

3. Have you ever used a professional diet company?
Never. :D

4. Do you have an issue with your weight?

5. Do you prefer sweets, salty foods, or spicy foods?
Sweets. Definitely. *nods*

6. Have you ever looked at a small house pet or child and thought, lunch?
Most likely. Can't pinpoint tho. XD

1. How many people have you seen naked (not counting movies/family/Passer byers)?
Um. Naked? None actually.

2. How many people have seen YOU naked (not counting physicians/family)?
No one has had the pleasure/horror of seeing me naked. n_n;

3. Have you ever caught yourself staring at the chest/crotch of the opposite sex during a normal conversation?
No. I'm not that... *blink blink* XD

5. What is your favorite body part on the opposite sex?
I like the WHOLE bodeeeeh. <3

6. Have you ever been propositioned by a prostitute?
Uh. I don't think so. XD

7. Have you ever had to get tested for an STD or pregnancy?

1. How many credit cards do you own?
None? :O

2. What's your guilty pleasure store?
That sounds wrong. XD

3. If you had $1 million, what would you do with it?
Make sure to secure part of it in a bank, then spend the rest.

4. Would you rather be rich, or famous?
I'd rather be rich.

5. Would you accept a boring job if it meant you would make megabucks?
Yeah. At least it isn't a dangerous job or anything.. plus I can always quit. :P

6. Have you ever stolen anything?
I stole free stickers when I was a kid. :X

7. How many MP3s are on your hard drive?
Only around 20. But that was after we formatted the PC. XD

1. What one thing have you done that you're most proud of?
Uhh...No clue. Really.

2. What one thing have you done that your parents are most proud of?
*blink blink*

3. What thing would you like to accomplish in your life?
I dunno. ._. My life is pretty much aimless right now.

4. Do you get annoyed by coming in second place?
Ahaha. I don't enter anything anyway.

5. Have you ever entered a contest of skill, knowing you were of much higher skill?

6. Have you ever cheated on something to get a higher score?

7. What did you do today that you're proud of?
All I did today was sing. ._.

1. What item (or person) of your friends would you most want to have for your own?
A passion. Something I really enjoy doing and can devote myself to.

2. Who would you want to go on "Trading Spaces" with?
Never thought of it.

3. If you could be anyone else in the world, who would you be?

4. Have you ever been cheated on?
There's never been anyone to cheat on me.

5. Have you ever wished you had a physical feature different from your own?
Smaller thighs/hips! x.X;;

6. What inborn trait do you see in others that you wish you had for yourself?
Sense of responsibility.

7. Do you wish you'd come up with this survey?
No. :P

8. Finally, what is your favorite deadliest sin?
The Numa Numa Dance. >8D

{/11:11 PM} - { 0 }
I'm almost somewhere.

Monday, March 14, 2005
Groggy Crappiness
Listening to: Electric Fan

Today was an argh day. Makes me want to go ARGH. :P

Had Thanksgiving Mass today. 'Twas ok. Had a laugh when Sister Anna gave me Communion. Also went crazy over the simple movement of my pointer finger. XD My worm rocks!!! XD

After mass.. had marching practice. With our grad shoes. Ok, so my shoes aren't that comfortable. n_n; I seriously should have worn my stockings. >_< Practice was, well, practice. We had to practice sitting down and standing up at the same time. Exactly what we practiced 4 years before at our GS Graduation. This is where things started to get all crappy. I talked with Gela concerning Ateneo. I told her about how I felt. And about my experience in the shower. Well, it was yesterday. The thought of getting into Ateneo was haunting me, that even in the shower I was thinking of it. Then I closed my eyes and prayed for God to show me a sign. Then when I opened my eyes, I looked at the soap I was holding. It was green. 'Oh shit.' I looked at my right. Shower curtain was green. I looked to my left. Blinds were green. Hell, even the bath tub was green for crying out loud. I was so helpless. Then I turned around, and hanging on a peg was a blue towel. SIGNS! Gah. I told Gela that I hadn't received an acknowledgement letter yet. Since my dad mailed it, she said that it might have gotten lost in the mail. X_X At this point I decided that when I got home, I would call the Office of Admissions and Aid to see if I could confirm that Fr. Que had received my appeal. Also talked about our plans over the summer, and Gela, Coco and I are interested in joining a Trumpets workshop. Plus we have to learn how to drive. And mom wants me to take oil painting again, as well as Informatics classes. O_o I don't know how I'll do all of that this summer.

Then it was lunch. 'Twas only after then did I appreciate my school shoes. But frick, once we got down to the canteen, we found out that there was no more food. As in, nada. Nothing. The canteen actually ran out of food. Oh man. Kari was a darling, and shared her lunch with me. <3 I feel like a scrub now. ._.

After lunch, we watched the FI do 'Fame'. 'Twas great. Rock on FI!

Got home. I was hungry, and craving for food. When I opened the frigde, all the junk food was gone! Eaten! Aaaaack, and I was craving and raving and having a mini-tantrum because I felt like crap. n_n; Called the OAA, and they said that they got my appeal, and that I should just wait for my acknowledgement letter. Phew. At least it didn't get lost. O_o

After I was on a temporary high, but it soon faded and I was feeling lethargic and groggy. My eyes hurt and I feel woozy. =_= Had a short conf with my Discov mates. Hopefully we'll be having our meeting this Friday at Gateway. I've never been to Gateway tho, so I have no idea how I'm going to get there. ._. The last meeting at Galle was cancelled, and so was the one before that at Katipunan. Hopefully we can meet up this Friday. :D Also got to chat with Mike. He was missing over the weekend. Turns out he ws just in invisi mode. ._. I don't get to chat with him as much as before. I don't get to talk with a lot of people as much as before anymore. =/

Demented Quiz time~

How Would YOU Take Over the World?

{/10:03 PM} - { 0 }
I'm almost somewhere.

Sunday, March 13, 2005
Listening to: Yellowcard ~ Ocean Avenue

I found some of my brother's Lucban pics.

Me, Mom, and Uncle Roger
Church Side
Church Front
Pro TeenStar
RAWR! <3
Atlas Moth

Phew. I've been swamped with photographs. There are photos all over my desk!

Ack ack ack. So many things to blog about. I don't know where to start. XD

New desktop. <3
Yes, it's Ariel. Wahahaha. Disney Princesses anyone? :P When Gela and I got bored during practice, we compared ourselves to our respective Diseny Princesses, based on looks and on personality.

Gela - Jasmine
Kari - Belle
Cai - Mulan
Racine - Aurora
Gretchen - Cinderella
Me - Ariel

'twas fun. XD Before I didn't really think I was much like Ariel, but after I thought about it, I found similarities. I collect a lot of things, I have a curious personality, I like to defy my parents[sorta]. King Triton is even sorta like dad. XD Heck, I even have a fork in my hair brush drawer. O_o But that's been in there since... forever.

Anyway. What else. We went to mass yesterday, so we went straight to a mall. We had to pick up Lola's ring, a heart shaped diamond worth 60k at SM North. Mom and I got to do some shoppiiiiing. <3 I now have a skirt that makes me look decent. [that's one thing off my wish list] I was also able to get some shirts for the summer. After my short spree, we had to look for shoes I could use during grad. So we looked all over the mall. I wanted the simplest, and hopefully the least expensive one we could find. The rest of our time there was spent just looking for the right one, and luckily I was able to get a pair right before we left and went home. On the way home, I finished 'Wild Justice'. Lesson learned: NEVER EVER read in the car. 'tis death. And the headache that follows stays even after the car has stopped and you're in your room craddling your head. n_n; Cooked dinner, then did all sorts of chores for my mom.

I'm getting more and more active on Deviant Art again, and I found this photo.

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

McHungry - Not Loving It

Sad how things really are..

Man, I'm just jumping around from topic to topic.

Oh, here's a pic of the finished backdrop for the gym. Stolen from Jackie~

Ok... I've run out of things to blog about. No, wait. Shit. I'm graduating this Saturday. Hasn't sunk in, like always. I can invite 5 people. 2 my parents, 1 for Jeth. I bet the other two will be for Auntie Tina and Uncle Vic. But that's still to be seen. After Grad, I'll be in the province.. again. Then I come back on Sunday, just in time for the Grad Ball on Monday. I saw a drawing of Coco's gown/dress, and it looks puuuuuuuuuurdy. :P Gela hasn't decided on hers. Me, I'll be wearing a vintage dress. It's black; tube with the skirt right above the knees. And it's got a cute flower on the left side. :P How I found it was actually and accident. Mom was supposed to give it away, but I saw it and voila. That was that. And I'll have my hair in ringlets. ;;) Hahaha! Geez. I hope a lot of people go.

Thinking again... who will give me hugs everyday after I graduate? Ja and Yeli will be gone. :(

I'm still worried like hell over my status in Ateneo. It's exactly like what Mrs. Benitez said it would be. It's like being held over a cliff by your little toe. >_< I have no idea where I'm going to go. I can go to Ateneo, I can go to DLSU, I can even go to UST. I have no idea where I'm going to fall. Some have already received a letter from Fr. Que confirming that he has already received their appeal letters. Obviously, I don't have one of my own.. I'm so frustrated and scared right now. I want so badly to get into Ateneo. I want to prove to my parents that I'm not as incompetent as I seem to be. Some say that my chances of getting in are big, some say that they're slim. I want to get into Ateneo. I want to believe that no matter what, God has a plan for me. I want to trust in Him that I'll be fine no matter where I go, but... I can't. I'm trying to, but it's just so damn hard. God, please hear me. Please listen to me.

Here's a demented quiz to cheer me up.
I'm Joshua Abraham Norton, the first and only Emperor of the United States of America!
Which Historical Lunatic Are You?
From the fecund loins of Rum and Monkey.

{/10:34 PM} - { 2 }
I'm almost somewhere.

Friday, March 11, 2005
Just Getting By
Listening to: Switchfoot ~ Dare you to Move

Things didn't feel right today. I was feeling totally awkward all day. Something was bothering me, and I had no idea what it was. So I buried myself in the book that my mom had told me to read, 'Wild Justice'. Then I'm to read 'Pillars of the Earth', then 'Dracula', which Coy gave me.

Everyone is getting pushed to their limits. Everyday is a countdown to Graduation.

Highschool pics
2 Inches Thick

These are all the pictures I have of my highschool life. A stack of memories, two inches thick. 4 years, compressed into still frames 2 inches thick.

Everyone wants it all to be over with. Get out of school, graduate, not miss the school, not miss the people. I don't feel that way. I don't! After 6 years, I can't imagine leaving. I know I'm not really leaving, but that's how it feels to me. I feel childish for not being able to let go. But it's true, isn't it? After you graduate, what are the chances that you'll cross paths with your batchmates again? I'll meet new people and make new friends, I know I know. I've been thinking about it for the past few days. I don't know why this is making me so depressed. It's 3am and I'm crying, just remembering how I almost cried while we were singing our grad song. I know I'm supposed to be happy for ourselves; proud and glad that we did make it. This is what we have all been working hard for. Cherish what we had. Look forward to what will be.

I love my batch. Even if we've been through so much shit through the years, you don't know how much I'm going to miss you.

At the end of practice, we sang our grade six graduation song. I only remembered the chorus. It was still fun fumbling along while the others mumbled the rest of the song though.

There's going to be a grad power point presentation, and we were all asked to find pictures we had of the batch from 1st year to 4th year. I store all my pics in a box, so they were easy to find. 2 inches. I found pics from the Ateneo interaction we had in 2nd year. Pics from our fieldtrip to Blue Rose/Roze? Farm. Pics of our fieldtrip to EK, pics of our trip to watch Florante at Laura when we were in 1st year, retreat pics, pics from our soph's night. Pics of 2-Gabay's play, 'Madman on the Roof', and me as the priestess of Kompira. Pics of our demented days of being freshmen. Pics of our interaction with 2-F of LSGH (now incoming seniors) that we had last year. Jackie!!! Hahaha. Memories, crapness. Pics of the J&J. Our speech bubble edited pics of 2nd year. Numerous pics of my bum. And I'm going to scan as many of them as I can and I'm going to share them with my batch. Except for the pics of my bum.

1 week left.

I'll end with a survey I stole from Racine.

1. Section mo nung 4th yr?
- IV-Bayanihan

2. Adviser?
- Ms. Alberto a.k.a. Mami Remy

3. Anong club mo nung 4th yr?
- Newsletter Club. Proud Assistant News Ed who joined Racine in being bad.

4. Anong pinaka-ayaw mong subject?
- None really. *thinks*

5. Eh pinakaayaw na teacher?
- Like above, none really. Though our teachers can get freaky and scary like hell, I think we all can get like that.

6. Anong student # mo?
- 1990285. =P

7. Class #?
- 41.

8. Pinakahuling ginawa mong katarantaduhan?
- Got caught sleeping in Physics. Lmao.

9. Eh magbisyo sa CR?
- I've had my vain moments. Is that a crime? ;;)

10. Naghihilamos ka ba sa cr?
- Nah.

11. Anong paborito mong off limits area?
- The corridor beside the offices. Haha. I always pass there even if we're not allowed to. XD

12. Nung 4th yr ka, maganda ba ung grad song nyo?
- But of course!

13. May nakaaway ka na rin ba?
- Nah. Oh wait, yeah. During the fair.

14. sino?
- A friend of my cousin, Christine. WATER GUN FIGHT!! XD

15. Nagvandal ka na ba? ano ung ginawa mo?
- On our lunch table. "Do not Vandalize" XD

16. Ilang taon kang nag-aral ng HS?
- 4 years.

17. Sa canteen ka ba naglulunch or sa classroom?
- Canteen. At the table right behind the Shawarma and the Footlong stands.

18. Ano ang madalas mong bilhin sa canteen?
- Cookies, Shawarma, Footlong, juice... Haha, practically anything.

19. How's the prom?
- 'Twas fun.

20. Name of a freshman you and your classmates....know of?
- Uh. I skip this.

21. What do you do after school?
- Make a ruckus in the classroom/clean if I'm a cleaner/go to the MMA and make a ruckus there

22. Ever cried in front of the class?
- Yeah. Retreat.

23. Do you bring your cellphone to school?
- Nearly everyday. XD

24. Do you log in to Friendster when you're inside the computer lab?
- Nope. Checked out the HOL Forums and my blog. =P

25. Ang mga experiment papers mo ba eh binebenta mo o pinapahiram sa classmate?
- Groupmates. =P

26. Sino palaging nagdadala ng food sa class?
- From what I know... Caj always has food. XD

27. Ano-ano nman ang dinadala nila?
- Poptarts, Cheetos... lots fo goodies.

28. Ever caught by your teacher eating?
- Nope. ;;)

29. Kanino ka humihiram ng notes?
- Racine. :D

30. Message mo sa high school mo?
- I don't know yet how much I'll miss it.

{/11:59 PM} - { 1 }
I'm almost somewhere.

Tuesday, March 08, 2005
Takas Session
Listening to: Computer fan

Guess what? I fell asleep on the floor earlier. ._. Was listening to my Roswell OST and texting and writing in my notebook [one of my many, many, many notebooks. XD] on the floor. Next thing I knew it was 1am, the radio was playing rock music, there were things all over my bed, guitar was on the floor... well. I basically trashed my room. Again. SO. I cleaned it like I always do.

Gah. HOL is calling for my input on guild matters. O_o I think I'm the youngest active member in HOL, or at least on the forums. [Most of them are like... 20+ XD] I never thought the guild would get that active. Then again, Sera is leading HOL, so I guess it's to be expected.

Like yesterday, today was blaaaaah. :P Ok, maybe not so blah. We had our JS Turnover today. We were asked to perform our Radioplay again, so at 11 we were excused from practice [YES~! XD] to practice the Radioplay. Mrs. Benitez said that one of these days she'd excuse us again so she can record the Radioplay on tape so she can use it for the later batches. Wow, legacy. XD

Turnover was ok... except for this one Junior. I don't know the whole story, so I won't post it. I might make matters worse or something. I ate Fun Shots for the first time today. n_n; Amoizing! Plus, we got our Fab 5 shirts. GO FAB 5!! WE ROCK! XD

Tomorrow is club outreach~ Going to go to Gawad Kalinga to build houses. Last year I wasn't able to go because we had out Entrep practicum on the same day. Also, Ms. Galicha got to see the cover that Gretchen and I worked on. Gretchie provided the pics and the lyrics, I messed around with it on Photoshop.

Hopefully the next Voices cover XD

After school... amazingly, Mom didn't call me down to do any chores. When I got home, I made mano [yuck, conyo] with mom and went straight to my room. I haven't gone down since then. Didn't eat dinner. Well, that was because I ate at the turnover.

I told Kari about the dream and who it was of. Like Gela, she said it was my sub-consiousness at work. It doesn't exactly disturb me. I guess I'm more... perplexed? Teh mysteries of teh mind. n_n; I guess I should try contacting them so they can be brought out of the depths of my brain. Woah. Deep. Not like me. :P

Now it's 2:28am. Must sign off or risk getting my phone confiscated.

{/11:59 PM} - { 1 }
I'm almost somewhere.

Monday, March 07, 2005
Grounded... again?!
Listening to:

Ok, I'm banging my head on the table now in frustration. Of all the times I get to sneak using the PC, the internet decides the bitch on me. Thank you. Thank you soo much, the universe consipiring with me right now. I can feel the cooperation! Yeah.

Anyway.. Gah. Today was crap. Boring. Singing. Running out of voice. 9 more days of singing! T_T Blah blah blah yeah. Still have 9 days of singing, practicing, checking of gala uniforms and such. I have to have my grad shoes by wednesday. O_o Right. So, good luck to me. n_n;

Guess who managed to get grounded again? ._. Yep. I don't know how I do it. I'm really good at doing whatever it is tho. n_n; It was over the APEX exam thingie for DLSU. I missed the deadline for it, and so I'm not going to be able to take them. It's a sort of exam where you can get free credits in certain subjects if you get high scores. I don't really care about the APEX, because I want nothing more than to get into Ateneo. I am completely paranoid over getting into Ateneo. Now I know EXACTLY what Racine felt when the UP results weren't out yet. I don't know what I'll do if I don't get into Ateneo. I THINK I WILL DIE ok maybe I won't die, but ugh. The thought. No. I will not think about it. Gah. I HAVE to think about it. I should have just passed that damned ACET so I wouldn't be in this state. >_< Now I'm researching the new BS Computer Science course that DLSU is offering; BS Com Sci ICTM. O_o I should ask Carmi what she's taking. Jeth isn't exactly very supportive of me taking Com Sci, because that's the course that he failed while he was in the States. If he can't do it, I can't do it, so he says. Uh. Ok.

I got the letter from UP telling me that I didn't make the cut. n_n; Which is ok, I didn't expect to pass UP anyway. I wasn't vying for UP like Racine. The cut off for UP Dili was 2.322 I think. My UPG was 2.525. At least I can get into UP Cebu, UP Baguio, UP Tacloban, UP Pampanga, or maybe even UP Mindanao. XD Surprisingly, my score in science was my highest. O_O Beat my language and reading comprehension skills by 4 points. O_o Math was the one that pulled me down tho.

Over the weekend, I've been paying more attention to how my mom treats me and how she treats my brother. As much as I don't want to compare, I am, and there are major differences. Ok, lets put my brother and I next to each other, shall we? Physically, we're practically opposites. He's a guy, I'm a girl. He's blonde, I'm brunette. He's tall, I'm short. Shorter. Fair skinned, morena. List goes on and on. Attitude-wise, we're still different. Nearly opposites as well. He's into daily life grinds, I'm more flexible and open. He's stubborn, I'm not so stubborn, but still stubborn nonetheless. He's quite responsible, I'm not so. He's more into academics, I'm more into the arts. His room is a mess, mine is organized to an extent. The list goes on and on, and is even longer. Even with these differences in mind, I don't see why my mom treats him so differently. He's pampered. n_n; And she recognizes him more. I don't mean to sound jealous. Yih, anything but that. It just feels unfair to me. My parents know that my brother is dependent on them. And they tell me that they don't want the same thing to happen to me. I understand that, but the measures that they're taking to make sure that it doesn't happen are starting to feel like I'm being trampled underfoot. =/ But I understand them. I really am irresponsible, as much as I hate to admit it.

Had confession today. I told the priest about how I was being disobedient and was swearing a lot. But at least I still go to Mass every sunday. He told me to pray. And so I do. And will continue to do so.

We had kittens recently. Just 2. One of them died this morning. It was because the mother wasn't taking care of it. It was sickly. It couldn't stand and would barely eat. I always urged it to live while I was ironing clothes or washing dishes. When I found out it died, I went to the backdoor. I saw the mother there. I wondered if animals could feel sadness.

Long posts = a thoughtful poster. Or, just a person who likes to retell things that have happened. I guess I am both. :P

I finally bought myself a CD. I don't remember the last time I bought myself a cd. :O It was the Spongecola CD, but I don't remember when I got it. :P Haha. Meeeeeeeemory loss. Anyway, I got the KJWAN CD. Felt like rocking out when I got it. Was having moodswings at Rockwell then. n_n; Plus I was able to get my mom to buy me the Phantom of the Opera OST. <3 Yaaaaaaaaay. I haven't listened to them yet tho. ._. I always get called downstairs to do chores. But I'll try to tonight I guess. Hopefully I won't fall asleep.

Gah, I have to re-install Nero. D:

[Belated Happy Birthday to Cai who turned 17 on March 5 and Gretchen who turned 16 on March 6~!]

{/9:11 PM} - { 0 }
I'm almost somewhere.

Sunday, March 06, 2005
Listening to: ~

The first thing that popped into my mind when I woke up was; "Omg, what the heck did I just dream about?" It was the second/third time this person that I have not had any contact with since last year has popped into my dreams. This time this person was on my bed. O_o Well, just sitting, but still on my bed! I don't know; it kinda freaks me out. Like Gela said, it's most likely my sub-consious mind at work. Nothing really happened in the dream, but the fact that I'm dreaming about them makes me think. Hey, sub-consiousness, what exactly are you doing in my sub-consiousness?? XD

Second was; "...it's raining. O_o" Well, I woke up at 6am, because I had slept at 7pm the previous night. [Got grounded on Friday.] I didn't know if it would continue on till the evening, but as I would find out, it would.

Third was; "I don't want to get up. XD" I stayed in bed until 10. XD

Fourth happened while I was listening to my MP3 player on my top bunk; "Woah, prom ngayon." Honestly, I was too groggy at that time to really think about it. Yellowcard was emoting in my ears and the rain made me even more lazy to sit up from where I was lying. But I did. At 10. n_n;

The prom itself was fun. I had a lot of fun there. Lots of things to remember. :P I wonder if I can type them all? I'll try. So I can look back and have a laugh. At around 6 Matt came to pick me up. It was raining, and on the way to Ateneo we wondered what they had done about the rain. Cai called to ask where we were. Soon Kari called as well to find out where were were. Got to Ateneo, where we met up with Cai and Yoyo, who she amptly introduced as 'The Waiter'. Met a lot of people there. Most names I can't remember. n_n;; Gay guys rock. XD It was cold there, and Matt kept on offering his coat, but I kept on declining. I should have traded my dress for that polo and slacks. ;;) Lmao. XD Moving on. I learned that Matt doesn't know how to bike! Or skate! :O Like Racine! I don't know how people can go through childhood without learning how to bike and how to skate. ._. When I was young that was all I did. n_n; Saw Mai there. And we did some... things. :P Yeah. In front of our dates too. XD Matt called me a lesbian afterwards [as a joke] and his friend sitting next to him slapped him. Lmao. XD Thanks again for that. :P Got pictures. Attempted to dance! [Met up with Kari, Gela and Di.] And yes, the most amazing thing of the night; the coke. <3 All was well until the bags of my 3 friends were stolen. Argh. I felt helpless. All I could do was look around and ask SHSians there to look for the three bags. But most of all, I felt bad for the A-guys. >_<

It was already past 12 when we left to go home. Matt was worried about my curfew, but I already told my dad I would be late. We were talking when my dad came out, so it was cut short.

Way different from my prom last year. I was stag last year. :P Going stag as a girl is different from going stag as a guy. Why? I don't know. But I still had fun last year even if I was stag. :P

'Twas fun. I had fun. I'm glad I went. :)

{/9:08 PM} - { 0 }
I'm almost somewhere.

Thursday, March 03, 2005
Last Day of Finals : CL and Physics
Listening to: AC

*groan* It's 1am right now.. and I just woke up. D:

Soooooooooo. Let's start, shall we?

Ok, so I breezed through the CL test. As much as I didn't want to study for it, I told myself I would be so pissed if I managed to fail my CL test. n_n; Physics wasn't that hard either. Surprisingly. The only part where I had a hard time was the derivation of the two formulas. :O And I actually understood the problems at the back of the test! Haha. I'm so proud of myself. <3

Matt, Yoyo and some other guys came to the school to deliver their invitations. I have Cai's Prom invitation, as well as my own now. I said I would go, if he promised that there would be no dramatics during the prom. I'm going as a friend, who enjoys playing games and likes coke.

Ack. I haven't asked if I can go out tomorrow. D:

Highlight of the day: Matt came over to the house to ask my parents if I could go to the prom. Formally ask. Funny, the prom is this saturday. :P But anyway. Matt came over and well. It was quite... weird? I don't know. I've never had to entertain a guy in my house before. O_o Anyway, Mom and Dad went through the drill. After asking their questions, they went off to cook dinner and watch the news. So Matt and I got to talk. One thing that I learned from Gretchen is that with guys, you have to be very clear on what you mean. Which is true. Being vague can cause a person to jump to conclusions and such. Back to what I was saying; it's clear that I don't want a relationship or anything. I was glad when he said that he respects my decision, but said that he'd give it one last shot over the summer. n_n; After a while we ran out of things to talk about. So I invited his friends inside. I didn't want them standing outside all night. After a while they left. Going to sleep over at their friend's house. (I wonder what guys do at guy sleepovers? Haha. XD) After they left, Christine, my cousin, told me that the cake Matt had brought was Coffee Crumble. Ack. Coffee. n_n;;

After that... well. I ate dinner, which was spaghetti. Then I FELL ASLEEP in the study room. D: and that was around... 8? Great. n_n;; That's why it's now 1:57am and I'm wide awake. T_T

{/11:59 PM} - { 1 }
I'm almost somewhere.

Wednesday, March 02, 2005
Third Day of Finals : Econ, Teen* and Accounting
Listening to: Yellowcard ~ Everywhere

Finally, a new layout. I don't really like the color, but the image suits my blog theme well.

Last day of Finals tomorrow. CL and Physics.

The tests today weren't that hard.. AP was a bit tricky, especially because my mind went completely blank when I reached the last page. ._. Teenstar and Accounting were a breeze tho. Nothing that I studied came out tho. O_o Barely anything at least.

Had the weirdest conversations with Cai about coffee and Cervical Mucus. *blink blink* Don't ask. XD After we were dismissed, I stayed with Racine at the covered walk. Talked a bit about things. Yeah. Bus windows cause vanity! Went home. Jeth came home and brought 10 people along with him. O_O They had to make a movie about Jose Rizal and stuff. They actually braved the fields next to our house. :O

Earlier I was rather proud of myself for finally changing my layout. Now I feel. Blank. ._. I still can't seem to concentrate. =/ Blah. I suck.

I swear a lot now. >_< I curse and only realize it afterwards. And I say the Lord's name in vain.. frequently. And I say f*** to myself a lot. Great. If there was a recycle bin in my head, I'd empty it out right about now. Because my head is just filled with trash.

What's wrong with me?

{/8:07 PM} - { 0 }
I'm almost somewhere.

Tuesday, March 01, 2005
Second Day of Finals : Pinoi and A. Geometry
Listening to: Yellowcard ~ Firewater

Pinoi was surprisingly not murderous. Analytic Geometry surprised us all by leaving us dazed afterwards.

Someone is looking for this blog.

Yeah. I don't know if that person will find it, but if they know where to look, they will. Blogging has become an essential part of my life now. I don't want to have to stop.

I... This week has been horrendous, for reasons that will be left unsaid. Don't go jumping to conclusions. I don't want to go on like this; being pulled opposite directions by so many things. Why the hell is my life so hectic anyway? I'm only 16 for goodness sakes, I'm not even working yet and I already feel tired all the time.

I want some time for myself. >_< It's like every moment I'm being chased by someone, something, or both!

...I know you guys are tired of listening to me. I'm getting annoying. I too am annoyed. Annoyed with myself. And with other things.

I want this week over. Now.

{/7:34 PM} - { 1 }
I'm almost somewhere.